Sometimes after change

I still feel no different than before,

just the leftover remains

drying in the sun

like leaves waiting to crack,

split into unknown powders.

We share these moments

like unhappy endings,

this is where we tell each other lies,

where the tests we take

are only there to judge us,

to remind us

that someone wants us out,

someone wants us to lose

almost as much

as someone else wants us to win.  

I found myself at the bottom of a bottle, broken at the base of the stairs and dancing on broken glass.

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My eyes can only see so far

and in the burden of distance

all I really have

are these interpretations.


Any time your name comes to mind

I always hear

the same song in my head.

It twists my memories

into something more obscure

and as your name

cuts itself into me

I feel more like a witness,

someone taking notes

just so they remember the only person

they’ve ever known.


There’s something about

the space between buildings

that lets us forget,

it lets us walk past it like a graveyard

where garbage meets discarded people

and dumpsters hold more than we’re willing to say.



Sometimes all I have

is the look on my face,

that instant reaction

splitting the way you see me,

like my answers were standing behind me,

taller than me

and knowing you’d see them,

like dust

in a sealed room,


waiting for a single breeze.



I don’t know

where I am right now,

all I do is sail the air

and keep finding

excuses in my hands

like sign language directions

were my only way to apologize .

This life I’ve lived

was never a part of the plan,

but more apart from

who I wanted to be,

but still

I am someone with a story,

someone open to everything,

yet still connected

to the pieces I leave behind,

tethered to everything

that makes me

who I am.


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