today/someday

I’m gaining on that moment
where this school year has reached its fingers around my throat,
I think I’m failing one of my classes
and my bank is taking me to court.
There are times when dying doesn’t seem so bad
and in the sweeping feelings that break free from reason
I begin to loathe my own reflection.
I wish I could cancel all the orders that I’ve made
and slip into the empty wishes that’ve carried me this far,
just long enough to convince me that I’ve been walking this whole time
until the realization helps me remember
that there was a time when I could breathe without masks,
but beneath this layer of rain
I only find myself trying to stand
and hoping I don’t drown.

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About Sean O'Gorman

Spoken Word poet from Ottawa. View all posts by Sean O'Gorman

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